Saturday, August 4, 2007

Why do I over eat?

J is helping me realize that I overeat for many reasons. In the past I would just overeat and feel bad, sick and guilty and not care why I did it. I would just eat more- it was a destructive cycle. I honestly thought that I simply really like food and I have no self control or willpower. Since I've been trying to eat intuitively, my binging has gone from every night to once or twice a week. I admit, I feel a little bit guilty for that once or twice a week binge.

The book tells me to lose the guilt and to be nice to myself and learn from these experiences.

From page 31: "It's important to be kind to yourself and appreciate the learning that comes out of the experience. This process involves coming from a place of curiosity rather than a place of judgment, so whatever you do, don't beat yourself up mentally!"

From page 32: "As with any process, it's important to stay focused in the present, and grow from the many experiences you will encounter. If, however, you focus on the end result (which for most people is the amount of pounds lost), it can make you feel overwhelmed and discouraged and end up sabotaging the process. Instead, if you acknowledge small changes along the way and value the learning experiences (which can be frustrating), it will help you stay on the Intuitive Eating path and move forward."

Ok so now that I'm not going to beat myself up for overeating, lets look at why I do it.

1. EMOTIONS - way too big of a topic to discuss here (more will follow, I promise). I will say that this is the main reason I overeat and now I am conscious of it so I'm doing better.
2. "One Last Shot" (pg.80) - I eat out a lot but every Sunday I eat dinner at my brother's house and his wife is the best darn cook - I know I won't have food that good again until next Sunday so I keep eating.
3. People make fun of me and my new approach to eating. This one was hard to figure out - J helped me here. I felt dumb when I was around people that poked fun at Intuitive Eating so I started joking about it too and eating more and exclaiming, "I can eat this, I can eat whatever I want. I'm being intuitive." In reality I was already full and didn't actually want anything more to eat. PLEASE DON'T TEASE PEOPLE ABOUT EATING ISSUES. I mean even if they are still in the dieting mode, I can see the same thing happening. I could also try not telling people about my new approach to eating ... Lets face it, that is impossible for me - I started a blog about it. Come on.
4. Rebellion - I want to prove to myself that I am in control of my life not someone else telling me what to eat. This is actually part of #1 above (emotions).
4. Food lacked the satisfaction factor (Chapter 10, principle 6). This one happened to me awhile ago. I ate dinner - it was fine, not particularly good but I checked in with my fullness and I was done so I stopped. About an hour later, I was dying for something more tasty and when I finally decided what I wanted, I couldn't stop.
5. I let myself get too hungry (Chapter 6, principle 2).

I NEVER feel good (physically or emotionally) after I overeat, if I'm honest with myself. And because my new goal is NOT weight loss but feeling good, it makes no sense for me to overeat anymore.

From page 33: "You'll find that your body feels so much better when your stomach isn't overfilled, when your muscles are toned and your heart is fit. If you focus on how you feel as the goal, rather than on weight loss, you'll find, ironically, that you can't help but lose weight."

From page 30: "Intuitive Eating depends on ... how willing you are to make weight loss a secondary goal and learning to become an Intuitive Eater the primary goal"


Ann Dee said...

So weight loss can be a goal? Even secondary? Seems like to be a true IEer you'd have to seriously reprogram your mind and weight loss as a goal at all would have to go. WAY easier said than done.

ktb said...

GP - however I think the authors are being realistic because they know most people will always want to lose weight and it is much easier to shift focus than to lose the goal altogether. I'm trying to lose the goal altogether but I think I will always want to lose weight. Time will tell - I'm working on this.

Lisa B. C. said...

Katy B. I love this blog. It makes a lot of sense to me. I've never had a scale in my house. I judge by the way my jeans fit. If they are too tight one day then I need to eat less that day! Of course, I haven't always been successful at that, but it is a one day at a time thing that way.
I hope your jeans feel too big for you soon and then, darn it, you'll have to buy some new ones!
Good luck former PHS SB Girl President!

Lisa b.c said...

I wish I hadn't made that comment about the jeans. It sounds like I'm bragging or something and I didn't mean to be. It sounds like I know just what I'm doing and I don't. I've had many different sizes of jeans in my life. The point meant to be that I have never had a scale in my house. Just to prove that I don't really know all the answers to dieting (like my comment kind of sounds like)...I'm a terrible, terrible eater. Yesterday I had 3 Pepsi's and I'm really mad at myself about that!

ktb said...

Lisa - Not to worry. I'm sure no one thought of your comment that way. For every pepsi you had yesterday, I had 2 Dr. Peppers. Sooner or later, I'll need to start drinking intuitively - not just eating. Don't be mad at yourself - just learn through the experience - as they say in the book.

Although my main focus is no longer weight loss, I'll be glad when I can fit into some smaller jeans!

Thanks for your comment! Love KTB

Kimberly said...

KT- My "Toxic Shock Syndrome" was actually a bad kidney infection and I ended up in the emergency room. Fan-effing. I love your blog and I can't wait to get the book, to eat for no other reason than to feel good and healthy makes so much sense. I think you are awesome for posting your experiences. Let's eat intuitively together at Thanksgiving in the Carolina's.

Kimberly said...
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